You have already created the “reality” in which you exist via the thoughts, habits, and actions you’ve repeated over and over throughout your life. You will experience whatever you believe. And you will believe whatever you repeatedly tell yourself is true. This is why ditching those types of mantras and consciously creating (and endlessly repeating) ones that are aligned with what you’d like to experience and who you’d like to become is a powerful way to change your life. We humans decide to believe stuff all the time with little or no proof that it’s possible or real: We decide to believe in a god; we decided to believe we could go to the moon. Belief is a muscle, and when you’re changing a stubborn old habit and really stretching yourself, a hell-bent decision is the perfect personal trainer to get your belief in shape. Each time you successfully participate in your habit—walk three miles, say not one snarky thing to your mother—mark that day on a calendar. Use something ceremonial, like a special pen or a gold star sticker. The simple task of acknowledging a job well done is very satisfying, and being able to look back over days, weeks, and months of successfully doing what you promised yourself you’d do is even better. This is why the practice of taking things one day at a time (for 20 minutes at a time) is so liberating: It removes the drama of “forever” from the equation and allows us to more softly put aside old ways. It also allows us to step back and practice imperfection, process, and patience by acknowledging that change takes time.
